the people in my life

it's amazing to see who is in your life because they want to be and who is in your life because you want them to be. and how often. being busy and having to cut back on the amount of time i can exert on social events has really narrowed my circle of friends. i didn't realize how many people i was friends with just because we were in the same places all the time. and how few people i was out and about with were actually the "call each other on the phone lets go do something or catch up real quick" friends. it's kind of sad, but at the same time really cool to think about. i mean, really, what did people do before cell phones and internet? and why do we get so upset when people don't answer their phones or respond right away to our text messages? i see a reflection from a society of instant gratification. we want what we want when we want it and quickly, and time and energy and preparation should not be elements that are required to get that thing we desire.

so i guess i just wonder, who do I want in my life? and how badly do i want them in it? enough to call and make it happen? make myself be a part of it? and how long before i realize all the effort is coming from me? do you keep pushing or just let go? how much of our relationships and friendships are based on our convenience?

all food for my thoughts.